You win some you lose some

January 13. 2011, under Blogr with One Comment

I’m officially an art student once again. My educational background is somewhat sketchy, having a history of dropping out of high school and college as well. I have to say I’m excited and disappointed at the same time. My first day of classes was not what I expected. My first class turned out to be an hour earlier than what I had on my schedule and I my heart sunk when the professor said she doesn’t give any tests. I always preferred taking an exam than writing a paper, it’s not because I can’t write, because I can demonstrate quite the opposite, it’s just that I never enjoyed to be forced to write. In high school I got plenty of F’s because of it. when I did write a paper, my teachers loved it and I would get an A. Thank you Ms. Mason from my pre-AP English class, for teaching me how to write an essay. I told my dad about my disillusionment and he said that my dear older sister told him that I am in fact, a great writer, unpolished, but nevertheless, really good. Coming from my sister, that really means a lot, she’s worked for book publishers and magazines, and newspapers.What does worry me is the format of the papers I have to turn in for my Art History class. It’s been quite a while since I attended college so I’m a little rusty. 3-5 pages is a lot, when I write I tend to be pretty concise. I had a History teacher that said that if there’s one thing he hates most in a student’s work is word vomit. I learned to never write unnecessary words or sentences. My teachers would forgive me if I wrote 3 sentences instead of 5 since I answered and included everything they expected me to except for the word count. I dunno, I can’t wait to see how my first assignment goes. So far I have to read book introductions and a chapter about cave art.

My next class is Basic Drawing, I was hoping to be able to produce something in the class to use for my art portfolio that I have turn in March but I don’t see that happening, so I have to look for my old sketch pads and see if I can find anything, that is, if I can even find them. I’m a little nervous about my portfolio, I still haven’t done anything. The whole moving process is really making things difficult ’cause I have stuff in 3 different cities.

Emotionally I’ve been very moody. Sometimes I’m happy, excited, and overwhelmed but other times I’m depressed, crying, and filled with turmoil. Change is hard, I’m trying to cope but it’s not easy. Today I was supposed to continue the cleaning and unpacking process but I did nothing, it was raining and that didn’t help my mood. I don’t miss my old life but there are things about it I deeply miss and those are the things that hurt to let go. I hate moving, but I should be a pro by now, I’ve never lived in a place for more than 5 years since I was 6 and I’m not even an ARMY brat. Ah well, it’s my life and I try to make the best of it.